I trust all of you are having a wonderful summer...it’s been a great July for me. I have especially enjoyed visiting with some of you "kingdom coaches" on the recruiting trail. Thanks for the encouragement! Another special treat for me was last week after a day of observing games, I got to have dinner with Dallas and Jane Willard. On these occasions, I bring my paper and pen and write down about everything each of them says.....can you say WISDOM?

This time, I specifically asked Dallas about several challenges I believe we have coaching today’s young ladies. How can I as a kingdom coach, teach them about kingdom principles in the way Jesus did it? Since I am at a state university, I want to make sure I follow the rules and don't force my faith on my players. How, then, can I teach these not-yet-believers of the principles that have worked so well for me?

FORGIVENESS was one of the concepts I was curious about. As I have blogged about before, my players, and can I add people in general, have a real problem with this. It is just not natural. The result of this unforgiveness is a lack of long term relationships. I view that as a huge problem.

According to Dallas: Most people don't know what forgiveness truly is! The matter of forgiveness simply means that we will resume relationship with one another; we are going to stop punishing one another and live forward. It is the resumption of relationship. Unforgiveness, then, means I will cut you off and not continue in relationship with you. It is a problem because people believe if I forgive you, I am saying that it is okay that you hurt me, and also that it is okay to do that again. It worries them that we think to forgive means it was okay. So it is easier just not to forgive. Then I restore my rights and keep you and your hurt away.

To help our players with this issue, we must understand that it is a character issue and speak to them about character. Get them to discuss greatness. Have you ever been forgiven? What is forgiveness? Do you ever think you would need forgiveness? When someone offends someone else, who is the greater person, the one who forgives or the one who committed the offense? Does the ability to forgive make someone great? Then you must help them learn to establish a boundary after they forgive that will keep them safe. Again, forgiveness does not mean it is ok for the person to do this to me again. It only means that we will resume relationship with one another.

1. Do a study about what the Bible says about forgiveness. What is your favorite parable that Jesus told to illustrate this important concept?
2. Think about a time when you , as a coach, needed forgiveness from a player or another member of your team. Contrast that with a time when you forgave someone on your team who hurt you. How did these make you feel?
3. Can you see the importance of Dallas’s definition of forgiveness in building a team?
4. Read what you can about the umpire who , earlier this summer, made an incorrect call and prevented a pitcher from pitching a no hitter. How did each of them react? What was the public reaction to this event?

I am optimistic that Dallas’s concept of forgiveness can help you in building your team. There are countless times I know that my players have held grudges for a long time, and it always hurts the greatness of a team. I feel better equipped to handle these cases and hope you do to.

Eat some watermelon and bask in the sun for me. It’s summertime.

Keep the faith,

Jane